Delay

Contest results will be delayed due to yesterday's death of my Big Poppa/Grandpa Renton.

8 Ball Says...

Here are your answers to Monday's quiz. If you're feeling brave, or like you want to win a prize, leave a comment with how you did. You can be anonymous if you want. Feel free to share things that were shocking to you, or where you think you know me better than I know myself.

Once again, the winner(s) will be announced on Monday after all the comments are in (10pm, Sunday July 26th cut off for submissions to be eligible for the contest, but feel free just for interest sake to let us know how you did beyond the cut off date, just no prizes for you).

1. What year was I born? - 1981
2. What city was I born in? - Wallaceburg, Ontario, Canada
3. How many children are in my family? - 2
   
4. Where do they live? - Whistler, British Columbia, Canada; Hamilton, Ontario, Canada
5. What is my favourite colour? - Blue
6. What is my favourite sport? - Baseball/Softball
7. How many citizenships do I have? - 1
   
8. What is my favourite animal? - Giraffe
9. What colour is the stone in my nose ring? - Pink
10. How many piercings do I have? - 7
11. How many tattoos do I have? - 2
12. What were my high schools sports teams named? (like Spartans or Pioneers) - The Blue Dragons
13. Excluding Canada, how many countries have I set foot in? - 5 (USA, Ghana, Holland, Hong Kong/China, India)
    
14. How many times have I been engaged? - 0
15. Through what did I become a Christian? (although the Holy Spirit is technically a correct answer, it is not the one I'm looking for here) - Northumberland Youth For Christ
16. Who is my favourite jazz artist? - Billie Holiday
17. Who is my favourite theologian? - Martin Luther
18. What was the name of my first car? - Maurice
19. What major(s) and minor(s) did I graduate with? - Double majors Religion & Theology and Theatre Arts with a minor in English
    
20. What year did I graduate from university? - 2008
21. If you know, I'll give you a hug to not tell anyone what year I graduated from high school. - 2000
22. Name 3 things I'm allergic to. - Honey bees, wasps, certain trees, certain grasses, ragweed, dust mites, cat dander
    
23. What is my favourite drink (I'll accept one of 3 answers here - or all three for bonus points)? - Coca Cola Classic, Purple Knee-high, Pina Colada made from scratch
24. What is my favourite type of non-anglo food (or "ethnic" food)? - Thai (or maaaaybe Mexican)
25. Name 4 jobs I've had since I left high school. - Integrated pest management technician, grant proposal researcher and writer, assisting seniors in learning computer skills, rec centre staff, tree nursery staff, gardener, pita roller, pita pit manager, teaching assistant, baby sitter, production assistant, production manager, ice cream truck driver, landscaper, lawn crew girl, Spectator door-to-door subscription sales girl, A&W burger maker, greenhouse worker, office/administrative assistant, data-entry monkey, research monkey, envelope stuffer, singer, YMCA membership sales & service rep, uhh and I think that might be it

Everyone Has Their Price

Franco Language Police: What makes you think I can be bought?
Anglo Restaurant Owner: Short, cheap suit, sweats too much; I read you're the perfect candidate for a bribe.
- Royal Canadian Air Farce

I want to encourage you to jot down your answers to Monday's quiz questions. If you're running into problems with some of the answers and you're worried that you may end up out of the running for one of the exciting prizes, I have a piece of information for you - I can be bought. Yes, there it is, on the internet for all to see. A case of Coca-Cola Classic, a Big Mac meal (no onion, extra pickles), a sack full of candy, a pizza, a lovely neck/back/shoulder massage, buffalo chicken, mozza sticks, gasoline, ice cream cones, mafia hits on people I owe money too, trips to Cancun; all of these are acceptable bribes for an answer or two (feel free to make up your own bribes).

One of these highly affordable options could give you the edge on the road to fame. The winner(s) will be featured on this...very...blog on Monday, along with what they have won! Can you even stand the excitement? I know I can't, so I think I'll fall asleep.

I'd start fueling up my jet or getting my chickens and buffaloes together if I were you.

Testing, Testing

If you're on facebook you may have been subjected to a barrage of requests asking you to take quizzes testing your knowledge of friends and family. I'm proud to say that I have managed not to take any of these quizzes. But I can say that I am intrigued by them. Every so often I like to give my loyal blog readers an edge over facebook peeps.

In that spirit, I am creating a "How Well Do You Know Lstew? quiz right here, right now. Read the questions, jot down your answers somewhere and on Friday I'll post the answers. There will be a prize (or prizes) based on scores.

1. What year was I born?
2. What city was I born in?
3. How many children are in my family?
4. Where do they live?
   
5. What is my favourite colour?
6. What is my favourite sport?
7. How many citizenships do I have?
8. What is my favourite animal?
9. What colour is the stone in my nose ring?
10. How many piercings do I have?
11. How many tattoos do I have?
12. What were my high schools sports teams named? (like Spartans or Pioneers)
13. Excluding Canada, how many countries have I set foot in?
14. How many times have I been engaged?
15. Though what did I become a Christian? (although the Holy Spirit is technically a correct answer, it is not the one I'm looking for here)
16. Who is my favourite jazz artist?
17. Who is my favourite theologian?
18. What was the name of my first car?
19. What major(s) and minor(s) did I graduate with?
20. What year did I graduate from university?
21. If you know, I'll give you a hug to not tell anyone what year I graduated from high school.
22. Name 3 things I'm allergic to.
23. What is my favourite drink (I'll accept one of 3 answers here - or all three for bonus points)?
24. What is my favourite type of non-anglo food (or "ethnic" food)?
25. Name 4 jobs I've had since I left high school.
    

Give The (Mostly) Non Kosher Gift Of Love

Let's say you're sitting around and you're thinking, "Dag, that Lstew is a great ol' gal. I'd love to encourage her. I think I will do that by buying her a gift." Now, this thought might come to you because it's leading up to the 25th of June or the 25th of December (aka birthday and Christmas). Or maybe you've noticed me working hard and want to help reward me. Or maybe it's a day ending in 'y'. Who is to say? Regardless of what brings on this beautiful inspiration, I have a few ideas for you as you choose to express your love.

Now, it is no secret that I love bacon. While noodling around on a great website, I stumbled upon a goldmine of bacon related gifts. Rather than a lot of descriptions, why don't I break it down for you list style:

• bacon soap
• a bacon belt
• bacon watch
• bacon floss
• bacon gumballs
• bacon jelly beans
• bacon bandages
• bacon wallet
• uncle oinker's gummi bacon (funny, i haven't seen this uncle at any family events recently)
• bacon mints
• a bacon pennent
• bacon air freshener
• what would bacon do deluxe spin folder
• bacon placemats
• bacon toothpicks
• bacon wrapping paper (great for wrapping up all the gifts you got)
• metal bacon dome lunch box
• mr. bacon t-shirt

Well, that should keep you going for a bit. While you dig out your credit card, I'm gonna go lick my dreams.

Oink.

How Did They Get This Pic Of My Mom's Cat?

And has anyone heard from my Dad lately?


see more Lolcats and funny pictures

This Is Like Your Free Preview

Everybody tells me that someday I'm going to write a book about the things that have happened in my life. Every once in a while a line comes to me that (in my head) sounds like it would be good in an autobiography. I think I may be starting a new potential ongoing series by sharing a couple of those lines with you know.

"... and that's when I realized that not everyone could instantly identify a portrait of Martin Luther."

"Michael Jackson died on my 28th birthday... at the pub while we were celebrating, the televisions paused their ongoing tributes to him in order to show us live coverage of the moving of his dead body. It was great birthday party fodder."

Not Prophetic

Take a good look at this, 'cause you'll likely never see anything like it again...

Terribly Sinful

I'm secretly hoping that someone from my recent past blog stalks me. If so, CK this is for you:


marriedtothesea.com

Didn't This Happen To A Cousin Of Yours?

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

ps - this was post # 1400

This Will Be The Only Way I'll Be Able To Own A Home

marriedtothesea.com

She's A Good Sheila Bruce, And Not At All Stuck Up

Happy Canada Day

The Eye Soap

It's 10:30am and I've already seen 2 topless old men. Any guesses on what my daily total will be?

Really?

How come we can make Christmas lights that will flash to specific music, but we can't find a way to wrap the average stick of butter so that you don't have to open both ends to get a clear slice of the butter?

She's A Little Curvy

(a wee creation of mine: one tea light, one mini pair of vice grips, one cork, one cork screw, one crazy woman)

Where Was I When That Happened?

I was washing my hands after urinating this evening and looked at myself in the mirror. I noticed that one corner of my "eye skin" was all dark. I mentally chastised myself for having got my eye region so dirty and not realized it. Thusly, I began to try and wash away the dark spot. It turned out not to be dirt, grease or sin, but bruising. I have a partial black eye and NO idea how it got like that. Zero.

It's just a little guy, but still so strange.


I'll let you know if baby spiders hatch out of it, or if the police show up at my door looking for a statement.

Plane makes emergency landing in N.J. after pilot dies in mid-flight

Wow.

Plane makes emergency landing in N.J. after pilot dies in mid-flight

Shared via AddThis

Who Is Watching Who?

I'm cat sitting this guy for the next couple weeks. I like him.

Can I Borrow Your Pellet Gun?

Critters are eating my ripening strawberries. Two knowledgeable gardeners have jokingly suggested a pellet gun as a solution. Hmmm. I think the combination of insomnia and fire arms is a great idea. Look out Alexander and friends!

So Many Flightless Birds, So Little Time

If you're looking for something to do this weekend, might I suggest Wingfest at Pier 8 (that's the part of the bay front/harbour with Williams Coffee Pub).

It boasts:

• a whole lotta wings (and food)
  
• a midway - aka RIDES!
• an art show
• cheap boat cruises
  
• fireworks on Saturday night
• live music - including Henry Strong's current jazz band, The Spoons, Honeymoon Suite and April Wine

It's free to get in until 6pm at which point it'll cost ya a whole two bucks. You should probably check it out. I am.

Free

Just a heads up - today is free smoothie day at Bula Smoothie & Nutritional Bar in Westdale. You can find it at the corner of King & Sterling, one store north of the Pita Pit.

Specific Anxiety Disorder

www.toothpastefordinner.com

Alexander

This is one of my neighbourhood friends, Alexander. He's friendly and almost assuredly full of lead paint.

Nope

My cell is down until friday morning due to $$ constraints. Sorry for any inconvenience. Contact me electronically for our landline # if you need to call me.

Rex De Milo Looks Back At Life Lived And What He Must Do Now

To see the rest of Rex's pensings.