Wednesday, February 24, 2010

So You're A Little Sick Of It

Ok, you don't give two shakes about the Olympics. I can get that. I don't agree with it, but well, you just go ahead and live your empty, meaningless life.

Anyhoo, I thought I'd give you a link to a site that will give you some great advice and has nothing to do with sport.

7 Reasons To Keep Your Tyrannosaur Off Crack Cocaine

Monday, February 22, 2010

To Help Your Sense of (Groovin') National Pride

I know sometimes it's hard to get excited about this country. Especially as you're shovelling your way out the front door or killing swarms of mosquitoes. Or when your hockey team loses, your fraternal skaters aren't triumphant, or your bobsled flips.

So here is a music video from Halifax's resident hip hop/rap magnate Classified. Be advised, this may not be work or children safe due to one partially muted f-bomb, a couple of d@mns, mentions of marijuana and a few people consuming alcohol.


Friday, February 19, 2010

Things That Are Cool

  • gold medals
  • being able to text your brother while he's at the sliding centre and say... tell him that the Italian bronze medal luger is a hottie and ask him to drop my name, or ask what the delay is with the women's skeleton start
  • Lloyd Robertson's cryogenic chamber

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Not So Linear

  • lent starts today
  • i have a crush on alex bilodeau
  • i have a crush on maelle ricker
  • why on earth did i think that giving up coke and bacon for lent was a good idea when lent starts during the olympics
  • i'm so dang proud of my brother right now
  • giraffes are nice
  • quatchi is nice

Monday, February 15, 2010

Celebrate Family Day With...

Lady Gaga!
Ah hahahahahasnorthaha coughhahahachokehahaha.

But seriously, this acoustic live performance of Poker Face makes my socks shoot of my feet.

Friday, February 12, 2010

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

What Else Would This Be About?

Straight from the good people at Monkey Goggles, we have the Bacon Eater's Manifesto Part 1...

This document is a recently discovered artifact of an organization that existed in America during the 1950s. The Society for Culinary Acceptance of Bacon competed for membership with the Masons and Oddfellows during the height of secret fraternal organizations. SCAB didn’t hide itself behind secrets and mystical ceremonies like most groups, it was just a bunch of guys that really liked bacon.

Still, they produced several important written documents, including this recently-uncovered Bacon Eater’s Manifesto. Although its language and some of its attitudes may appear outdated, we present a section of it because its central wisdom still holds true today.

The Bacon Eater’s Manifesto

Before beginning, we must acknowledge bacon as the most perfect food that has ever or will ever exist. It is the food which holds the perfect balance of fat and salt. The crispiness to withstand even the moistest sandwich and the heartiness to make even a salad edible. We sing the praises of bacon. We dance in its honor. We close our eyes and inhale deeply allowing its scent to enter our bodies and fill us with happiness as if we were human balloons and the bacon is God’s breath.

Bacon is also the universal food, for it is not elitist fancy-pants eating. It is enjoyed by everyone from the lowliest hobo to the wealthiest Wall Street tycoon. Even Mr. Rockefeller himself is known to partake in bacon during breaks from counting his large stacks of money. It is the chosen last meal of death row inmates and the first thing men ask for after being rescued from desert islands. After all, if you were stranded on an island, would you rather have a beautiful woman or endless bacon? The choice is clear.

We suggest renaming the pig to something more descriptive of its purpose. This animal should be renamed “living bacon” or “bacon with legs” so as not to hide that inner beauty it holds. The swine lives in filth, but just as plants grow from manure, so does the seed of bacon take hold in the swill of mud and garbage and grow into the redwood of meats. Bacon.

Now that we have paid proper homage to bacon, we name ourselves as eaters of bacon and set forth our purpose and pathway. These are the truths we live by and hold sacred.

1. There is nothing that cannot be improved by the addition of bacon.

Some might hold out sweets as being spoiled by adding bacon or a gourmet chef might say that the balance of a dish will be upset by the addition of bacon, but we state here and now that they are wrong. There is no food, or indeed no event, that cannot be improved with the addition of bacon. A single slice of bacon can act as a magnifying glass on the smallest amount of goodness or happiness in something, and magnify it to skyscraper size.

2. Bacon may shorten your life, but what is life without bacon?

Doctors, health nuts and vegetarians are constantly whispering in our ears that bacon poses some kind of health risk. That your life would be longer without it. But, we ask, what is your life without it? It’s a cupcake without frosting. A marriage without love. A summer without a sunny day. Quality of life must be taken into consideration when choosing your food. Do not waste time with green beans and squash; fill all the empty moments with the king of meat.

3. Bacon is the best thing at a breakfast buffet.

Loading up on toast or eggs is a tragedy. For they are simply buffer foods to distract you from bacon.

4. Bacon is so delicious, some people claim it wrote the works of Shakespeare.

We have our doubts that it did. For if bacon could write, why would it write something so boring and inscrutable to the common man?

5. The greatest odor in the world is the smell of cooking bacon.

If one were to truly and dutifully bottle its essence, even a woman plain as tap water could attract a square-jawed, Hollywood dreamboat. If it were promised that heaven smelled like bacon, surely men would do no evil from that moment forward.

The document then goes on to describe the ceremonial eating and enjoyment of bacon as practiced by those that know it best. You can read the second part here.

- David Wahl

Monday, February 08, 2010

Making The Best Of It

Two east of Toronto girls showing how it's done.

The hockey card shot.

Who needs a helmet when you have hair like Steve's?

Jacques Plante wannabe.

Who says you can't be cold and sexy?

Friday, February 05, 2010

One Week

Another reason to be excited about the Olympics...

Brighton resident part of Olympic magic

BRIGHTON -- Like millions of people, John Stewart dreamed of Olympic stardom as a kid.

And, like millions of people, he didn't achieve those dreams, at least athletically.

But unlike the rest, Stewart found another way to live his Olympic dream. With the Vancouver Winter Olympics set for February, the Brighton native moved to Whistler, B.C., in 2007 with the hopes of finding a part to play in the Games. With no relevant experience, he applied for a job on the track crew at the Whistler Sliding Centre, where the bobsled, luge and skeleton events will be contested. Not only did he get the job, he was soon named foreman of one of the track crews, and has spent the last two years working to create "the fastest track in the world."

"Everything a Zamboni does, we do by hand," explained Stewart, of the work he and his crew must do to prepare the track for the Olympics.

But while the driver of an ice resurfacer has the benefit of working on a flat surface, the workers in Whistler must contend with a 1.5 kilometre stretch of ice that twists, turns and dives, with a vertical drop of 152 metres. Even when wearing special boots with spikes in the bottom, slips are hardly uncommon, and when they happen, it's a long ride down to the bottom.

"It's not a job for the faint of heart," he said, noting how workers are often covered in snow, ice and water throughout their long days.

But if you can handle the work, it's very rewarding.

"It's a job you can take pride in. It brings out the perfectionist in you," he said.

"Our job is to make the track as fast and safe as possible."

By all accounts, Stewart and his team have succeeded. The track has been studied and used by athletes, spectators, broadcasters, and officials, many of whom have shared their belief that it's the best slide in the world. That's a source of immense pride for Stewart.

"It's the first time I've put my hands on something that's considered the best in the world. It's a real good feeling. This is a special place," he said. "It's going to be a crown jewel of the Olympics, (and) it will continue to be the preeminent track in the world for years to come."

When Stewart isn't working, he and his girlfriend can be found snowboarding across Whistler's incredible slopes. He has even taken the opportunity to bobsled down the track himself, not just for fun, but to better understand the feedback the athletes give him.

The rush that goes along with it is just a bonus.

After two years of work, the big moment is less than a month away, and Stewart and his crew will be working hard to ensure the slide is in pristine condition as the world's top athletes go for gold.

"Ever since I was a little kid, I've been enthralled by the Olympics," he said. "It's going to be a big party, (and) I'll be there in the thick of it. It will be incredible. I can't wait."

(article from The Brighton Independent)

Monday, February 01, 2010

Who Was That Guy?

There are a number of things in Hamilton that are named after people. Mostly, I have little idea who these people are.

So courtesy of Google and Wikipedia, I'm going to introduce you to some of these peeps via facts that I think are neat.

Meet Sir Allan MacNab:

  • born in Niagara, ON in 1798
  • when he was 14 he fought in the war of 1812
  • was a lawyer in Hamilton
  • successfully defended some area Tories after they were charged for tarring and feathering a local reformer who was accused adultery
  • he was knighted for leading British militias against William Lyon Mackenzie's rebels
  • with another dude was responsible for the construction of the Great Western Railway
  • his house was Dundurn Castle
  • was the Prime Minister of the Province of Canada for a couple of years