Not A Bodily Function

So I spent new year's eve with a fantastic group of friends that I often ring in the new year with. And we always have a good time. This year our good time was enhanced by a game that Lorraine got for Christmas.



This is quite possibly the more random game I have EVER played, and I have completed a Theatre Arts major. For real, this is a cracked out board game. Its like Cranium meets heroin, has a kid and that kid eats nothing but lead paint and magic mushrooms. Yeah.



Essentially you have to move your game piece around and be the first one to finish. The board itself just looks like a psychedelic yellow brick road. The game pieces are little cardboard characters, like The Dude, Mrs Picklefeather, Super Ninja Monkey... yeah. And every spot you land on is a colour and the colour matches up with a card. The cards make you do stuff - answer a question, brainstorm things within a certain category, write a roses are red poem about the player to your left, write a 5 line poem about your pet tuba named larry, you know pretty usual stuff. But some cards are a little crazy - like some of the personal rules (roolz) cards - Christine had to make a snorkel out of household materials and then wear it for the rest of the game, Justin had to wrap aluminum foil around one of his hands and leave it there. Or there was a rule for all of us - we had to imagine that there was a genie named Ned living on one of the cards and before we could start any turn we had to sing a song to him that said his name three times and included a wish. Um, ok.

One of the best quirky quirks to the game are the classified cards. These are supremely cracked out cards from many of the categories that no other player can read. Justin had to get someone to say farm equipment. I got a couple of these cards - the first one told me to get up, put the timer on and then pretend that i was trapped in a tree and being attacked by 5 lobsters and an angry dwarf. No one had to guess what I was doing, or anything like that, I just had to act that out for 30 seconds and then sit down and the game would continue. The other classified card I had asked me to ask myself if I would like a mint, slap myself across the face and reply that I would love one, then turn to the player on my left, ask them if they would care for a game of hopscotch, then giggle like a school girl, then pet my pet walrus who is on my lap, then tilt my head to the sky, smile and say something like "Chuckles always enjoys a good scratch behind the ear. I farm because I love it." There is a trick to these cards though - with such cracked out activities being asked of you and no one to check up on you, you could be cheating. So if someone decides they want to check your card they can, but there are penalties - sometimes they have to move back spaces, but sometimes, just sometimes its a positive penalty and they would advance.

I wouldn't play this game with Oma.