How To Earn A Dollar (In 15 Easy Steps)

1. Begin clearing kitchen table
2. Notice bowl of hot peppers
3. Notice loony sitting in front of friend
4. Notice urge to put a hot pepper in your nose
5. Express urge to put hot pepper in your nose
6. Listen to friend offer 1$ in return for putting the hot pepper in your nose and then eating it
7. Let friend pick the pickled hot pepper ring
   
8. Take hot pepper and insert pickled hot pepper ring fully into one nostril
9. Sniff (at request of friend)
10. Carefully remove hot pepper from nose
11. Put hot pepper in mouth
12. Chew
13. Swallow
14. Go upstairs and blow your nose and feel your nose ring throbbing
15. Put loony in wallet