Routine Spirituality

As spontaneous or random as you may perceive me to be, it is a lie. Those who have lived with me realize that I am a creature of routine and habit. I love my routines. They keep me on track. They help keep me sane. I am able to adjust to changes in the grand sense but spiritually I have been struggling.

Five days a week I go to school. I wake up an hour and fifteen minutes before I need to leave the house. This allows me to spend thirty minutes doing devotions and forty-five getting ready to leave the house (although in theory devotions are part of that getting ready thing). This is great. I love that time, I cherish it. All semester I've had Saturday mainstage rehearsals, so I've kept the same routine. And church is at the same time every Sunday, so same morning routine. Excellent, everything is on track. Whoot, whoot.

Then comes a diversion in the routine, say something like, oh, I don't know...reading break. Dum, dum dum! I don't need to be up for a certain time (except both Saturdays and Sundays), I can just take my time. And its on those days that setting aside that time doesn't seem to have that same priority.

In my head I'm saying "sleep a little more sister, yeah that's it. Ok, now turn on the computer, check your email, you've got alllllllll day to do things, you can do your devos later. It's not like God's going anywhere. Relax."

In my heart I'm saying, "you should do your devos. You know if you don't do them now you won't do them later. You'll get distracted for a whole day."

And then I get up and do some half-assed reading/prayer thing and piss the rest of the day away. Awesome Laura, you're on fire for the Lord. Look at you go. How do you do it?

Umm, no. Though maybe its not devotions....

I know a lot of people who get more done when they have more to do?

Huh?

You know those weeks when you have three papers, a test and a presentation to do? And you manage to get all of it done plus the stuff you normally do and you were still able to help your friend out as she broke up with her boyfriend? Right. So how do I fight that time thing? How do I live with a purpose on days when I don't have a clear agenda?